My life changed when I first started playing video games. Anybody who has played video games should know there are many different types. Games can involve fighting, shooting, racing, puzzles, and the list goes on, none of those are my favorite. My favorite type of video game is role-playing. This type is designed with a long story. Unlike other types, it only needs on person to play the main character. Often, the story will revolve around this character and grows in depth as the main character progresses through the game. An average role-playing game takes about forty to fifty hours for the story to unfold, unlike fighting and shooting which usually last about two hours depending on how long the person wants to play. I use role-playing games for entertainment and the effect is that I have become unsocial, lack confidence around people, and am strangely addicted to my private virtual world.    

     I started my first role-playing game when I was about eleven or twelve years old and became unsocial between my elementary and middle school years. Children around elementary age usually go and play outside with friends rather than sit in front of the television for hours, but I was different. I ran home after-school, determined to continue my quest on the game, whereas other ran home to play with their friends. I would sit in front of the television playing what I thought was my one and only entertainment for hours and wouldn't budge until the day ended. I lived with my grandmother and uncle and they didn't enforce bedtime so even after it got dark, I would refuse to go to bed. As a result, I ended up not making many playmates in my childhood years because I never made time to make any friends. At the time, I never thought about making friends. Friends didn't matter to me because I always had my video games. In the end, I regret never running out to play on the playground when I had the chance because I'm unable to do that now. Being as old as I am now, it wouldn't look right for me to swing on the monkey bars.

     When I turned fourteen, I realized that my middle school years were ending. That was the age to start spending time with friends, but I was still so hooked on my games that I never made time to spend with them. Most of my free time, I stayed home and never went out with any of my girlfriends (it surprises me that I had any girlfriends at all since I kept to myself most of the time). Whenever I had any free time from school or house chores, I would continue my quest in front of the television. When my girlfriends called me to go out somewhere, I often refused and said I had other things to do. I didn't make any best friends. I knew making friends wasn't hard to do, but I never bothered. I feel bad when I look back on how I neglected my friends back then. They bothered taking their time to make friends me. They included me in every event but I always refused and kept them away. Playing video games most of the time made me value my friends less and less as my middle school years came to an end.    

     When high school swung by, I knew that I lacked confidence around people. I came to the conclusion that because I had buried myself with video games for years when I was younger, I never learned the people skills others my age had. I didn't have much of a social life during those years and never built my confidence around people when I grew older. It was hard to look at people while they were speaking. I never figured out why I had such a hard time looking at people when I was speaking to them or when I was spoken to. I know it is considered rude, and I've had a couple of misunderstandings with a few people because of that problem, but I was never able to do anything about it. Since I never knew how to fix my problem, nor improved my communication skills, I grew even more distant from having a social life. I became isolated in my own private world. Living a life of video game solitude, I became what many would call, a loner. I never spoke to many people and I kept to myself most of the time. It came to the point that people just didn't bother to speak to me. There would be rare times when someone actually bothered to make friends with me, but I never had fun being around them because we didn't share the same interests. For example, when I talked about video games, they would think about something else. I could tell because their eyes would wander elsewhere. When they talked about movies, it was my turn to think about something else, namely continuing my game. We would take turns pretending to listen to each other babble about some cool game characters or some cute actors in a movie. No matter how hard I tried to have the same interests they had, like movies or fashion, it wouldn't be long until I went back to my little private haven of role-playing games.    

     I knew I became addicted to this virtual game system when my high school years ended and my responsibilities grew just like any other high school student. I had to deal with entering college, earning money, and pleasing my family, all at the same time. My stress level grew rapidly. Nothing felt better than to escape from these everyday problems and into a virtual world where I didn't have to think about anything else but killing a fire-breathing dragon. It became one of the best stress-relievers and kept my stress to a minimum. After a really aggravating day, I had refuge where I could seclude myself from people.

     The place that gave me so much stress was where I worked. When I was sixteen, I worked as a hostess in a restaurant. This job was one of the main stressors I had. Being a hostess meant dealing with too many people for me. They were all sorts of people: nice, rude, old, young, calm, the works. Most importantly, they were all annoying. I could never satisfy them no matter how fast they got their tables to order their food. I had to force myself to be nice to them because the number one policy in a restaurant is the customer is always right. At the end of the day, all I wanted to do was go home and put the game barrier around myself.   It was so relaxing that I didn't have to be around any more people. I didn't have to force myself to be nice to anyone or put up a fake act around customers who were always "right."    

     As I look back on it now, I see that the video games have an effect on who I am today. Strangely, just as the video games took away my confidence in my younger years, they also gave me the feeling that I am now one of a kind, and no one else is like me. No one else seemed to have the same interest in video games that I did. Nowadays, I learn how to keep a balance between everything that goes on around me by giving a little time to my friends, family, school and work. More than anything else I still find video games fun and entertaining. As a result of my long-term relationship with role-playing games, I still seclude myself from the people around me. But I keep it to a healthy level that if I ever need friends to be around, I do have them. I also improved my communication skills. Now, I can actually look at people when I speak to them, if only for a few seconds. I don't regret any effect the video games have had on me. Video games will always stay in my life; no other entertainment can take it away from me. Maybe one day, some game companies might be create a game system where I can actually go into the virtual world myself, but until then, I stay faithful to my console system.